Tag Archives: Space

The Proposals Barack Obama (Foolishly) Didn’t Make In The State of the Union

Fresh off having the first great “Tell Me How My Ass Taste” moment of his presidency, President Barack Obama has to be feeling pretty good. Also, he proposed a whole bunch of things like shutting down Gitmo, raising the minimum wage and so on. While very few if any of these things are likely to happen (because nothing ever happens), that’s all the more reason for President Obama to have used his penultimate State of the Union to lay out an ambitious agenda. (The following is to be read in Barack Obama voice for full effect. Make sure to include the pauses and applause breaks!)

It's kinda cool that we made this guy President, right?

It’s kinda cool that we made this guy President, right?

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The O.G. Awareness Campaign Goes to Space

Before there was Kony 2012, Tying a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Ol’ Bladder Cancer Tree and that Bully petition, there was Smokey the Bear raising awareness of the issue that plagues our increasingly urban and cosmopolitan population: forest fires. In retrospect, it’s weird to remember a bygone era where preserving the environment was uncontroversial. Also, that bear was dead effing serious. It wasn’t a juggling bear, a dancing bear or even a smiling bear. Nope. Smokey just stared dead into the camera and told you what’s what. In that way, it’s kinda genius because everyone’s first reaction is “Oh fun, a bear!” which is immediately followed by the PSA equivalent of being criticized by your second grade teacher for talking too much during class.

But now, Smokey is tackling  the final frontier. Checkit:

An American astronaut heading to the International Space Station has chosen Smokey Bear as his crew’s mascot.

This of course raises the obvious question: what is a space fire like. Apparently it’s basically a ball of flaming doom. And I never would have known that without Smokey inspiring me to look it up! Well played, Smokey.

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