Tag Archives: Roger Sterling

Winners and Losers: Donald Sterling’s Racism Edition

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Donald Sterling is a bit more Bert Cooper than Roger Sterling, if you know what I mean. (I mean he’s a racist).

The racist-ass comments made by Donald Sterling have been the big story in sports world for the past week or so, and  NBA Commissioner Adam “Sexy Silver” Silver came down harshly on Sterling, banning him for life from the league, fining him $2.5 million and saying he would be working with the NBA owners to force Sterling to sell his team. Sports, as we all know, is about winning and losing. But really so is life. So let’s do Winner & Losers, Donald Sterling Edition.

Loser: Donald Sterling

So as it turns out when you get caught saying a bunch of racist stuff on tape, you get your NBA team taken away from you. By “taken away” I mean, he’ll sell it at an enormous, enormous profit. By now this story’s been beaten to death, so let’s hone in on a few of the less-covered angles:

1) Sterling said it was cool if his girlfriend had sex with Magic Johnson, so long as she didn’t take a picture of it. Does this mean Donald Sterling has HIV?

2) Again, his initial rage-fury was over her taking a picture of Magic Johnson, a guy so beloved that even those racist pizza shop Italian dudes in Do The Right Thing liked him. Come on! Be a more discerning racist, Donald Sterling.

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Predictions for The Final Mad Men Season

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It’s time to play BOLD PREDICTIONS, where my first prediction is that you can figure out how a game called BOLD PREDICTIONS works. Today’s topic: The final season of Mad Men.

A fun little known fact: Mad Men executive producer Matthew Weiner’s first choice for the show’s title was Dontourage, but HBO executives insisted he change it into something “less stupid.” After the two sides failed to come to an agreement, Weiner took his show to AMC, whose executives secretly retitled the show Mad Men and have worked tirelessly with the crew, actors, and media members to keep Weiner under the impression that his show is actually called Dontourage.

As many of you know, Mad Men will be returning to TV on Sunday. For those who don’t know, Mad Men is a show about some guy named Donald who makes commercials for beans and popsicles. And sometimes A British Guy gets an NCAA Tournament-caliber leg injury from improper usage of the John Deere CarpetTrimmer (TM).

For these reasons, Mad Men is regarded by many as the greatest show on television. Plus, people seem to like Donald guy’s strong chin and charmingly insouciant alcoholism.

But with the show coming back on Sunday, it’s time to re-learn what’s going on and make some Bold Predictions.

Donald “The Drapes of Wrath” Draper

Also, his crippling nicotine addiction

Nicotine is like, #324 on his list of crippling addictions

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