Battle to Remove Porn from the Internet Redefines “Too Little, Too Late”

You Tell Me What Picture I Should've Run with This Story

As of, let’s say, now, domain names can now be registered to .xxx, a special designation for porn websites. As you may have heard, um, there’s already like, literally dozens of porn sites on the entire internet, including our sister site, betterthanvoodoo.xxx, which features, well, that’s not impor(n)tant.

In the interest of having a more than ten-word article (which could go like this: “a .xxx domain name has been created for pornographic websites.”) the USA Today found a CONTROVERSY BREWING on the matter of internet porn. People oppose it, and some have even picketed, which only served to demonstrate that the lack the basic knowledge that you cannot protest The Cloud.

“We are not in favor of the establishment of that domain,” Patrick Vaughn, general counsel for the American Family Association, told Mashable. “It just creates more real estate for the pornography industry, and it doesn’t exclude the sites that already exist. It might have been helpful if they set up .xxx, and that was the only place to find pornography. As this is, it just gives [pornographers] more to work with.”

Ignoring that the USA Today is now free-riding those intrepid newsies at Mashable, you can’t legislate the internet to keep regular porns out of anything ending in .com. Not possible, guy. Wait a second, I see a horrible metaphor coming:

Despite those benefits, some think the idea of putting all the Web’s porn eggs in one basket makes it that much easier for a government or third party to simply push a button and make it all go away.

Ah, the classic egg-banishing button. The metaphor’s more logical conclusion was that putting the porn eggs in one basket made them much more likely to be porn scrambled, which is really, not an improvement on what things were back in the ’70s, when you think about it.

What were we talking about? Right, porn domains. So, you know who’s leading the charge against this new domain name, besides hilariously anachronistic religious right types? You guessed it, Luxembourgian lobbyists!

Luxembourg-based Manwin, which also manages YouPorn, xTube, and other sites, is suing ICANN and the ICM Registry for essentially forcing businesses to cough up money to register domains before cyber-squatters do.

In any case, check out http://www.buy.xxx/ if you’re looking to secure a domain name preemptively. The good ones won’t be there for long.

And other ones have long disappeared.

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2 thoughts on “Battle to Remove Porn from the Internet Redefines “Too Little, Too Late”

  1. kita says:

    good job. picture choice was as good as anything else. the porn eggs in a basket were just looking for trouble.

  2. SBG says:

    Manwin…like a Manwich…but…even grosser! Which prompts me to ask…“A .com is a .com, but an .xxx is a meal?” Uhhhh! I mean… .xxx is a lawsuit?

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