Sarah Palin To Continue Not Being President

Today in Chicago, we had one of those gorgeous, crisp autumn days. I had just dropped off my daughters at their after school math class, laced up my running shoes for a jog in one of our favorite parks, when my cell phone buzzed It was a text from a friend: “Palin not running.”

I thought it was a joke. I texted back. “Where did you hear that?”

Silence.

Jasmine Velasco, Conservatives 4 Palin.

And the rest of us know it now too. Sarah Palin is not running for president.

Does this mean that consecutive elections were decided/influenced by Sinbad and Glen Rice? Yes! Well, I mean, except that Sarah Palin never had any chance of winning ever. And now we have to finally stop pretending like maybe she was going to be our President. I mean, I know that some insane people left their jobs to go campaign for her and everything, but…no chance. This all goes to my theory (I’m a political scientist by training) that stupid people can’t win party nominations. It’s pretty robust.

Sarah Palin is a media creation. For all the fun we’ve had mocking her over the years, she really is endlessly interesting both as a window into America, and intrinsically. (Except her books, which, I mean, yeesh). However, we’re only allowed to pay attention to her so long as she’s regarded as a somewhat legitimate candidate for President. The party’s over.

But the media will miss her so. And I will too. Who else do Republicans put on blast like this (besides Obama. It’s my understanding that he is unpopular among Republicans):

Palin will never become a party elder stateswoman. Over the past three years, it became apparent to all but a handful of cultists that her only interests were money and celebrity. She had no concept of public service, and no capacity to serve even if she had wished to do so. Soon even those last cultists will quietly abandon the argument. We talk often these days about makers and takers. Sarah Palin was the ultimate taker. She abandoned her post as governor of Alaska to cash in on lectures and TV. She squeezed her supporters for political donations and spent the money on herself. To adapt an old phrase, she seen her opportunities and she took ‘em.

Come on! Who else do we get to compare to Tammany Hall pols these days? And who else inspires this?

Today, we lost one of the very best in American history, a reticent genius and entrepreneur, an inspiration for countless of us who has changed the very fabric of our lives. And we also saw the end of the road for one of the very worst: a nasty, callow, delusional, vicious know-nothing, brewed in resentment, and whose accomplishments could fit on a postage stamp.

“I hired Sarah Palin because she was hot and got ratings,” says John McCain her boss at Fox News, Roger Ailes. Fair enough. And though that will likely remain true, it’s just not the same. At least SarahPac is still taking donations. Send money while you still can.

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