Tagged with Eddie Murphy

Sexiest Man Controvery Embroils America (Plus A Historical Retrospective on People’s BEST COVERS EVAR)

So, it’s come to this. People Magazine, the guardians of modern journalism who brought you stories of international importance such as “Dakota Fanning learns to do Laundry,” “Inside Zoe Saldana’s Pre-Breakup Family Dinner” and really, everything that falls under the aegis of their website celebritybabies.people.com, has named their World’s Sexiest Man.

And for twentieth year in a row, it’s Nick Nolte! Congratulations again, Nick! (My sources on this somehow turned out to be incorrect. We regret the error.)

No, the World’s Sexiest People’s Sexiest Sexyman of the Sexy Year is Bradley Cooper. I know what you’re thinking–I’ve already read nearly 100 words, get to the fucking point-so I will. This choice, while seemingly a generic selection of a good-looking white actor who does the kind of boring and awful movie that the humans who read People go see in droves, is a controversial one.

Why? Because Ryan Gosling wuz robbed, that’s why! Let’s go over Ryan Gosling’s resume:

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Reviewing the Reviews: Armond White Loves Jack & Jill

The sun will rise in the east. It will set in the west. And movie critics will blast any move that has Adam Sandler cross-dressing in it. These are well-established facts.

And so, it is with some delight that I present the world’s ONLY GLOWING REVIEW of Jack and Jill, courtesy of Armond White.

Adam Sandler’s comedies are not “dumb fun”; maybe that’s why they’re not in critics’ favor.

This evades the question of whether they’re not “dumb” or “fun.”

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