Helpful Advice: An Advice Column is a column where you tell me your most deeply held secrets and I answer them for fun and profit. Feel free to send any inquiries to jordan.alan.carr “at” gmail.com. All your problems solved or your money back.
For the past few weeks my husband Marty has been staying out late, giving no intimation as to where he’s been. He says he can’t tell me what he’s been up to because he recently “took stock of his life” and decided he needed more time for himself. It’s been very upsetting and I’m worried about the example he is setting for our 10-year-old son, from whom it is becoming increasingly difficult to hide this erratic behavior.
And yet, I still love him. He’s charming and sweet and a great father (most of the time). But it’s upsetting that he keeps this secret from me. I do trust him and want to believe that whatever he is hiding is harmless, but it’s harder to do that with each passing day. I’ve tried and tried to talk to Marty about it, but he just asks that I trust him and leave it be. I just want my husband back.
So, basically, what I’m asking is: in the face of all these problems, why is my instinct to ask a complete stranger to solve them for me in a public forum? Aren’t there some friends or family members I could speak to instead? Or is the very act of me writing to you a sign of something much more sinister happening to me?